A lot of people have a fuzzy idea about life coaching and what it is all about. Those that have an idea, sometimes confuse coaching with some kind counselling or therapy, which is certainly not the case. Some other people will tell me that they don’t need a life coach; they can sort out their own lives! Well yeah, you certainly can, but your life can be so much more awesome when you work with a coach… That is what coaches do! We help our clients unlock their awesomeness! So how do we do it? Unlocking awesomeness is a big promise…
A life coach’s two primary strategies is questioning and listening. This is probably where the confusion with counsellors and therapists come in, they also ask and listen. The difference lies in the type of questions we ask and nuances we listen for. Life coaches focus on the future, on solutions and where the client wants to go. If a client is unhappy in his job, a counsellor may ask: “What about your job makes you unhappy?” A coach may ask: “So what job will make you happy?” Do you see the difference? The one question looks at the problem, and the other one at the solution. The one looks to the present/past and the other one to the future. Both questions are valuable and important, and a life coach will probably ask both questions, but the focus will always be on the latter one. A coach will always focus on the client’s change and transformations. We focus on the future and how to find solutions.
Coaches listen, not only to your words, but to the meaning behind them. We are attuned to your body language and nuances in your voice. This all to figure out who you truly are. What do you truly believe about yourself? What are the things that really matter to you in life? Which of your needs are the most important? These points help us to help you figure out what it is you need to do. We want you to figure out how you can find the most meaning and fulfilment in your life.
Get a coach to work with you on the things you tell yourself. We all tell ourselves damaging things. A coach is someone who knows how to listen out for these damaging things. Once you know about these damaging lies, we help you find the truth about yourself. What is truly holding back? Guess what, probably not that thing that is “wrong” with you… That thing is probably a lie anyway. Once you know what truly holds you back, you can take responsibility to change it.
There is a lot of noise in life. Everybody we know wants something for us or from us. Even some people we don’t know wants stuff for us. The media has a very well-defined image of success, and that shapes society’s idea, which shapes yours. Your parents, your friends, your employer and some other people all have ideas about who you should be. The people around us do not hesitate in making their expectations clear. Living according to these expectations can be very very frustrating, especially when they don’t align with who you are. And when I say this, I talk from experience. So how do you focus on who you are? On what truly matters to you? How do you figure out your core values? Well, some people always know what they find important, but most of us get confused. I get confused from time to time. Even “successful” people get confused from time to time. That is why it is valuable to work with a life coach. A life coach can help you figure out what your values are. With the help of a life coach, you can change your lifestyle to align to your core values. This is important, because your values determines what success means for you; your values determine how you can best contribute to society.
We all have needs. Every time we consume media, there are advertisements telling us what we need. According to the corporate world, we need fast cars, new smartphones, gold jewellery and other luxury items. Those things are nice, but they don’t bring fulfilment, if they do, it is transitory. For fulfilment, you need to focus on these needs: variety, certainty, love/connection, significance, growth, and contribution. Which of these do need most in your life? How can you fulfil that need in a positive way? Your life coach will help you figure that out.
In order to get the most out of life, in order to contribute the most to society, you need to not only give attention to the points above; you also need this: a purpose in life. This is where the value of life coaching truly shines. Once you have a purpose to drive you in life, you can live to the full. A life coach will help you figure out a purpose that fits you well. A purpose to help you really make a difference, while still living the good life.
Do you want to have some of this good stuff? Do you want to live a truly fulfilling life? Do you want to unlock your awesomeness? I do my first session free, click here to sign up for a taste of life coaching.